breaking...

God is answering my prayers for my heart to be broken...

tho, its harder than i thought it would be. Way harder.

Injustice, poverty, murders, suicides, AIDS, homelessness, addiction, rejection, trafficking, abuse, domestic violence, rape, the unsaved...i find my heart crying out for the church to help, but no one seems to care. They're all too busy worrying about powerpoint or sound equipment or the building or the church leaders.

In my church, ive recently been asked to represent the youth board on the worship committee...that is totally fantastic, i have this real passion for intimate and meaningful worship and being on the committee will allow me to voice my opinion on the subject...but what if God is fed up with our songs? What if He is telling us to stop singing and we ignore Him, for comforts sake. What if our call to worship is more than songs/art/drama/whatever your gift is...

What if our call to worship has to be out there, outside our warm, comfortable, familiar churches...and out there giving and giving and giving instead of getting...

Thats what im gonna bring up at the next meeting. I seriously believe that God is fed up with nice wee songs and that He just wants us to go out and fulfill our roles as Christians ('little Christs').

I am ashamed of the state of the church...at the petty arguments over nothing that really matters, at Christians not showing love to one another...me and grandma were talking about that today actually...about how if Christians cant love one another, then how can they expect to be blessed by God or love effectively?

Im also ashamed at the greed of our society. I am ashamed of myself for wanting more 'stuff' when i already have more than enough material things...poverty is caused by greed.






So, im gonna pray about this. And if JC says i can bring this up at the next meeting then i will. And if JC says that i can get our church to take part in the Global Poverty Prayer Week...then i will.

Im ready for Him to take me anywhere. Bring it on God!