wow...i havent been on this thing for a while!
Well so much has happened! Despite being really terrified about getting my GCSE results, i passed all of them and am now back in portadown college (joy...) studying all of my 1st choice subjects (for those of you who are interested they are music, RE, ICT and english lit) so i guess in some ways thats good lol. School is great these days, a bit lonely at times, but the classes really inspire me and they are really in depth which is amazing : ) especially with RE cause i really dont like having to regurgitate bible stories in exams...i like to think deeper about things...and half of the course is philosophy stuff so thats brilliant : )
Summer Madness was...mad! It only rained a wee tiny bit and all in all the weather was top notch so a big thankyou to The Big Man up there for answering my prayers : ) i also found the teaching very VERY challenging...it left me thinking about how i live my life and how i need to change alot of it so i can be more in touch with JC and God and the Holy Spirit in my life. Amazing stuff : ) although i think that people who attend the likes of SM expect to come out of the morning and evening main stage worship sessions feeling 'fuzzy' and all nice and 'warm' inside cause they have experienced the love of God. And yes, you could for sure feel God in that place theres no denying it...but God didnt just want us to feel all cozy and then leave on a high. He wanted to see his love manifested in us so we can change the world. God made us hurt for the poor and the broken...and he made me look upon my life with shame...how i spend my money, how i focus on stuff that doesnt matter in the long run, how i walk on past hurting people without looking back. So it was weird walking out on the first night not feeling really good. But it was amazing, and i will never forget it. He taught me so much about everything. I really feel that SM this year was a real turning point for me in my spiritual growth...and yeah, that may be a somewhat cliched thing to say, but like, its just so true. And in one of the previous posts i had commented on how i find it impossible to hear the voice of God...well i heard it in the most clear way ive ever heard it before on one of the nights. God gave me words that i believe werent just for the person i was praying for, but were for me too. So much happened at SM, so much its unreal.
At Castlewellan Holiday Bible Week i learned what it meant to cry out to God...not by what people taught or from the worship or anything like that...it was just me and God...no one else. Just started praying in the middle of worship for ireland, for the lost, for the druggies, for the homeless, for the alcoholics, for the people who surrounded me worshipping in the room. I got the feeling that i had to pray for them to get convicted...so i did...and tbh, i dont know if it had an effect on anyone, i didnt open my eyes to look, but that prayer was one of the most passionate prayers i have ever prayed. And i knew God was listening...i always get this image of God when i pray...i imagine him sitting on this throne with this notepad in his hand...and he writes down my prayers...and when he is writing them down and perhaps forgets what comes next, the angels tell him and he laughs at himself and continues writing...it makes me smile to think of God laughing...i cant wait to go up there and laugh with him!
The TOM team left Richhill...Eliz, Ruth, Ben + Timmy. They were just so great there. They moved in that place like i dont know what...and they taught me heaps and they listened to me and gave advice and laughed and just loved. All of what i want to say just sounds so cheesy lol...they are such Christ-like people...and i love them!
Pete Ferg left the methodist circuit to train for ministry in the dark side (only joking : P)...that guy taught me more than he will ever know! He is the one responsible for bringing me back to God and for setting my heart on fire for Him. God is gonna work amazingly through pete, and his kid rebekah doesnt have a clue how lucky she is to have a dad like him!
aw flip, im getting all soppy lol. see, told you it was cheesy!
sometimes i wonder if anyone actually reads this...if they dont i dont really mind cause i enjoy typing up my thoughts...its very theraputic or something lol.
I wont leave it for ages before i make another post...promise ; )
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